Fuck this Guy

Yeah, you read that right.  So, first of all who is this mousy fucker?  He’s John Maus, a keyboardist who played with Animal Collective and Panda Bear, and has recorded a couple albums on his own.  Any time allmusic.com breaks out “experimental” in the first sentence you can bet the music isn’t going to be all that good.

So, what’s wrong with him?  Why not ignore him like the rest of the world?  Because this is the answer he recently gave in a Pitchfork interview when asked to name his favorite record store:

You don’t know how happy it makes me that the days of the record store are coming to an end. $20 for an LP? Do you remember going to the record store and not getting what you want because there was no other place to get it? Now we can get it all for free, and I think that’s wonderful. There was always something really depressing to me about record stores and music equipment stores. There’s something oppressive about them, like the guy who looks you up and down and looks at what you’re buying. You’re bound up in exchange with the snobby clerk. So I’m glad they all have little “closed” signs on their doors now.

You can read the entire interview here in case you think he’s been taken unfairly out of context.  Sadly, no.  Maus comes off as nothing short of an arrogant, pasty prick throughout, even calling our Orchestra Hall “one of the most rotten and ignorant places on Earth”.

So John Maus has been added to the list of artists we simply refuse to carry in our record store.

“Wait Dave,” you ask, “there is such a list.”  Oh yes.  Here it is:

1)  Anita Bryant
2)  John Maus

So what will we do with the John Maus records?  I suppose we can’t put them where we put the Anita Bryant records because there are people who will want them and we don’t want to cause dumpster diving problems for the cafe next door.  I think instead we will list every single record on which John Maus performed online, since that’s how he thinks we should all be buying our records anyway.  We will list them online and include his remarks in every listing.  When they don’t sell we will re-list them and re-list them.

 Afterword:  It gets worse.

I read Maus’ apology on the City Pages‘ Gimme Noise blog and the smug bastard actually digs himself deeper into his own rear.  Tomorrow we’ll celebrate John Maus, the great and misunderstood visionary artist, with our tribute to the bullshit apology.  Until then you can click on the link and read his.

1 comment

  1. Noah’s avatar

    Glad to hear Hymies puts Anita Bryant records where they belong…

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